Friday, July 24, 2009

Nurturing Your Inner Bitch

I’m a Bitch.

Oh, puleeze, Sueanne, you’re thinking. Get serious. You’re one of the nicest women.... You open doors for freakin’ everybody, you’re encouraging, supportive, helpful, friend to many. You practically have a therapy couch set up in the living room, for crissakes... This is all true. I am from the Midwest originally, which makes it even harder to believe I am capable of being Queen of all Bitches. You would never know what I am capable of...unless you have made the mistake of pissing off the Redhead.

Let me just say I consider it a compliment to be called a Bitch and I would encourage everybody to both
rejoice in and learn to bring out your inner bitch. Forget about the inner child. The inner bitch is way more fun. The inner child needs a binky. The inner bitch needs tequila. Do you see where I’m going with this?

Why be a bitch? Because we all love bitches. Who loves a doormat? NOBODY except a muddy shoe.

Does this mean you yell and scream at people and are a miserable and unhappy person? No. Do you make other people unhappy? No. Discovering your inner Bitch means you know who you are, are at peace with that, and you expect and demand other people to respect you. When you learn to love your inner bitch you will in fact be at the happiest and most content place in your life. 

Let’s all be strong men and women. Don’t settle for crap. I’m not saying you need to be mean. I’m saying suck it up, be strong, ask, no ...demand...  what you want and need, and don’t stop until you get it. You determine what it takes to make you happy. So be a fucking bitch when you need to be. Life’s too short to wonder what would have happened IF you had done something differently. Just do it differently to BEGIN with.

Whether that’s demanding better behavior from your significant other, or a better table at the new restaurant in town, or that your idiot professor change your grade because you deserve it... Be a Bitch. Hate your new haircut? SAY something. Be a Bitch. Need a raise at work? Tell them why you deserve it. Be a Bitch. 

You will quickly see that once people figure out you won’t put up with their shenanigans, they will give you the respect you need. Then you can tone down the bitch and just keep her on the back burner for emergency situations.

And, contrary to popular belief, there is nothing wrong with men being bitches. It really is a more masculine trait, when you think about it. Men get what they want, and so should my Bitches.


  1. Well played Sistah!
    What part of the midwest - me too :)

  2. Agreed on all points!

    PS Made a happy discovery today - I was using your business card as a bookmark for the book "the secret" and it made me smile!


  3. I like you, am kind and considerate to my fellow man. However... yeah, you saw this coming, I know, if you are shitty to me? Oh, I can be a BITCH - and a bitch is not always cursing and being crazy.

    Case in point: I go into a store with my husband. The chick behind the counter proceeds to call him "Daddy". um, what? So I say to her quite loudly, in front of a VERY long line of people "We are your customers. Call my husband Daddy is extremely unprofessional and disrespectful." I wasn't nice. I was matter of fact and don't f&ck with me. Her face got beat red, and her head lowered. Needless to say when we go in the store now she is extremely professional.

    THAT is our inner bitch. We put people in their places so severely, they change their ways. LOL!

    GREAT post!

  4. Bravo to you!

  5. Bravo to you Sueanne. I think your are doing an amzing job with this Blog.

  6. Sueanne-I love your blog. This is a great article-I totally agree....I agree so much that I started a website to help people Bitch anonymously.Here you can send secret mail-anonymous email and anonymous text.

    Hug, Amber